Long Time

It's been a while since I have posted. Why do I only come to post when things are bothering me? Things have been going pretty well. B-man is doing great in Kindergarten. And Little M is growing so fast and beautifully! I love our life. My biggest struggle right now is being on the other side of education! I don't want to ruffle feathers in my son's school. He has a great teacher, with a lot of experience. I have learned that when it comes to other's taking care of my child, I'm not always going to be pleased with everything. On our way to church tonight my son is asking me if his teacher will go to heaven. He wants her in heaven because he loves her and wants her to be in the same place he is going. He tells me that when he gets nervous he just has to give her a hug. He really loves and respects her. Later, on our way home, he says "Mom, I just want to be able to write a story, but I'm going to be in the low reading group, not the high one, so, I won't get to write or read well". My heart just plummeted! I never would have imagined shattering a kid's self-esteem like that. B-man is a great child, he wants to please everyone and he wants to be heard. He remembers everything and takes everything to heart. He is a smart, inquisitive kid! I'm not for one second concerned about his ability to read. I wasn't a great reader but I grew up to love reading. I may read slow compared to some, but it is because I want to think and relish over every sentence of a good book. I want to remember and apply information in a Non-fiction book. B-man will learn to read, he already reads a lot to me and he knows a lot of sight words. He can blend phonemes, segment, and sound out words. I could go on and on. So, it's not his ability I'm concerned with. I want build him up and I NEED to talk to his teacher. But I don't want to ruffle feathers and make his life miserable for the rest of his time at this school.

Full Circle

Since becoming a Mom in 2005 and again in 2009 I feel like my experiences have brought me full circle. Life has given me a lot. At the time of my son's birth, well, I felt like life was over, I felt like I wasn't going to survive if I lost him. Now, I realize how fortunate we really were, how much worse it could have been. My heart has become tender for other moms who have struggled or lost. Especially this time of year.
Most recently,as I watched my son throw a huge tantrum. I stood back and just thought of how crazy he was acting. He's frustrated as he tries to grow into an individual. Five and half years ago, I thought the hospital was going to forever be our life. I now have a great appreciation of this stage in his life. And I say a prayer of thanks. Now, I have a respect for other moms that I didn't have before. Just like each child is precious and unique, so are each parent's style of parenting. I am just finding myself really really grateful. I've been given a heart for other parents. Being content when very little money is in the bank.
I find myself loving more and hating less. I will never regret this time with my children. My car is beat up, my clothes are old and some nights I feel really overwhelmed. But I'm learning everyday to appreciate it all.