Saturday, August 29, 2009

I support you....

My husband and I have this saying "I support you in your wants and needs". But how do you support someones wants and needs, when their wants will drive you to live off food stamps. I know its a male thing, but seriously.... After my walmart adventure yesterday where I spent more than I should have and didn't bring home much food, we had to sit down and have a 'talk'. That's not his words or my words, they are just words. I bought two unnecessary items at Walmart. 1) the movie Sandlot 2) a monster truck, HEY, I had to bribe B-man through the trip anyway.
My husband is a HARD worker. I've never met anyone who works harder than he does. He works full time as a Lead Liason Engineer (which means he carries a laptop and iphone so that he can handle issues on the go), on the weekends he drives an ambulance, and he is in school full time with Calculus, Chemistry, and Music Appreciation. He has one degree but he is going for another. I'm trying to support him but I need time to work it out. All the sudden I am a 'single' mother but at the same time I need to have a clean house, his clothes ready, dinner cooked for everyone by 6:30 and did I mention a clean house? I try and I mean really TRY to have things picked up when J gets home, but I live with a little TORNADO! My Tasmanian angel can demolish a room in 6 seconds flat. And this week has been extra hard!!! Remember when I blogged about how Little M always screamed, but then YAY, she can sit and play on her own and she is a happy camper. During the happy camper weeks I got things done and rooms cleaned, and dinner cooked.... NOW, Little M has decided that she's not happy with sitting and she wants to crawl. She's almost there, I'd say about 2 more weeks, but this means she does face plants and screams more. ALSO, she screams when I'm out of the room now. I'M LOSING MY MIND! B-man hasn't been a good listener and is all the sudden aggressive! So, during our talk about HIS (my husband's) wants and OUR needs, and why isn't the house clean and spotless for him. I lovingly said "Take a week off work and YOU figure it out, let me know how to do it, then I will" (but remember your on call that whole week to take care of a baby around the clock when she accidentally gets a hold of bananas) I give this ultimatum with confidence because right now, it CAN'T be done.
Can I just say that neither of us has any idea how hard the other one works!

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Dr. D

Little M had her eye doctor's appointment today in Tulsa. It went great! We love Dr. D, he had a soothing voice and was really easy and gentle with Little M. When we walked into the office it was bright yellow and at the entrance was their sign. The whole office is very kid friendly with animals tucked safely in aquariums, big screen TV's, huge fluffy pillows and the nicest staff! Sometimes you get staff that are grumpy and that was not the case. From the receptionist who took our co-pay all the way to the eye glass shop lady, everyone was so nice. They took the time to explain things to us and help us weigh options.

B-man will love it when we go back in 3 months! This time he and his Papa went and had ice cream and 'Emmy' (what he calls his grandma) and I stayed at the office. My in-laws were so incredible to take the day off and take me to Tulsa. They have been there through the beginning with our children and their eye conditions. I don't know why both of my kids have this condition, but I'm so thankful for family support.
I'm sure a LOT of you have the question of "How do they prescribe glasses to a baby?". Well, here it is. Each slot contains a different lens, and after Little M's eye's were dilated the Ophthalmologist carefully looked in each eye to view the optic nerve and how her eye focuses. This is where the doctor can rule out more serious things like Opticblastoma. After initial screening Dr. D had a pretty good idea of where to start with the lenses you see pictured. In addition to her far-sightedness she also has significant astigmatism which basically means the lens in her eye is bent in the shape of a football. She may grow out of this but for now she has to have glasses. I'm so thankful to be a stay at home mom right now because I will be able to work with her at keeping her glasses on her face.
Little M was so great and happy today. She really loves to be out and about. The only time she got fussy was when 'Point of View' eye glass shop was fitting her frames on her face. I'm hopeful that this was because she was so tired and just wanted to be left alone to sleep because that's what she did when they left her alone. Ha Ha. So, all you prayer worrier moms out there, please pray that I will have the patience to help her with the transition into glasses.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

"Mom, wipe my bumm!"

Oh, yes, I hear this at least twice a day and then proceed to wipe another little bumm on a changing table. B-man does wipe is bumm all by himself but in the spirit of efficiency and disdain for raw bottoms, mommy always checks. So, while on a play date today I was tending to my son when I noticed a perfect round circle on his bumm, pinkish in color and raised. Hmm. On his marry way he went and a little later a few more pinkish circle friends appeared. Then a few more and more and more. I'm talking Daddy sizes and baby sizes of little pinkish circles on face, back, bumm (as previously mentioned), arms, tummy (really bad on tummy) and legs. Just a few though, very mild. My mind is on auto pilot thinking of all the things he ate 'turkey dog, apple, banana, fruit snack, milk....' all things he's had before. We decided it must be something in the house, but what? we have been there before. Hmm. Then it clicks! Six days ago he received a MMR vaccination (just three years off schedule) DING DING DING. So, we called the doc and meanwhile more circles are popping up. As we left and went to my mother in laws the dr's office called. We determined it was a reaction and discussed next steps to watch for that are normal or danger signs. By the time I got to MIL's his rash had doubled. His bumm was now completely covered! And he was running a low grade fever. So much fun!
In short, we took him the to doctor to be safe and now he is in a deep sleep induced by benedryl. Our new little pinkish circle of friends will last up to TEN days. Oh yes, that will be fun to explain while we are out and about.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Bathtub Beauty's Eye Appointment

Look closely at Little M's left eye, it turns slightly inward. This was a sign that I didn't recognize with B-man. All the signs were there for him but no one caught it. With hope and prayer we venture into treatment for the same thing with Little M. Today she was positively diagnosed with strabismus by my optamologist. He explained to me that she is severly far-sighted which means she works extra hard to see things up close. The doctor decided that it would be best for us to see a specialist because she is so young. We will be seeing a Pediatric Ophthamologist in Tulsa. Truly and honestly we are very blessed and I completely realize this. There are so many parents out there who would love to have only this problem, this simple diagnoses, strabismus. As much as I would like to wallow in self pity for what my daughter will have to go through to get through this; patches, glasses, drops, possible surgery.... so, tiny in the spectrum of things. How blessed I truly am, how wonderful my Plump Princess with her Chocolately Brown Eyes is. She will get through this and so will the rest of us. We caught it super early, for that I am hopeful that it can be corrected, the great thing about far-sightedness is that it is correctable! Being near sighted like myself is not correctable.
Little M was exhausted after a day at the eye doctor and lunch with Papa. She fell asleep like this while playing on the floor this afternoon. Sweet Little Girl, I love you so much.
By the way, Little M is 17lb 11oz at her last check up and 26 inches long. She is the 60th percentile for her weight and 30th percentile for her height. In other words, she is short and pleasantly plump.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Deliciousness and all its Glory

I just had a delicious nap. My intention was to only lay down for a brief moment and take in the sound of silence and all it's glory. I listened to the soft tap of some unknown noise and was lulled into a delicious nap. I don't normally describe sleep using the same adjective that I might use to describe how I feel about Chili's. But delicious it was. I woke up totally filled, so delicious it should be. I was roused by the squeak of my son's door which informed me that he was well rested and ready to rejoin the world as well. Of course, I laid there perfectly still in hopes that I could steal just a few more moments of rest. Then a soft squeal came from my daughters room, she was also well rested now and ready to rejoin the world. So, here they are, two special gifts from God, enjoying each other in play.

While basking in my delicious nap, a dirty little something was looming over me. Well, not over me but in my kitchen. A dirty kitchen that desperately needs my attention.
I hesitate to post a picture of my dirty sink because only McKmama can make a dirty sink full of dishes look like a peice of Art. Remnants from last nights dinner begged to be washed away and paint from yesterdays adventure need to be placed in it's rightful spot as well.
This has truly been a wonderful weekend.
And now for a SPECIAL PRAYER REQUEST. Here is Little M! Completely opposite from her brother in every way but ONE. Her eyes, chocolately brown eyes, that need to be lifted in prayer. Like her brother, she is beginning to show signs of strabismus. We will be visiting on Tuesday morning to see if therapy will work to correct this. I'm hoping that we caught this early enough that it can be corrected without surgery. Although the surgery is not huge and shows no scars, like any mother, I don't want my baby to have to have surgery. B-man did well with his but did not do well with waking from anastesia.
Please pray that we caught this early enough that the strabismus can be treated non surgically.

Friday, August 7, 2009

Noticing a Cycle

Ok, so, most of the time my little brown eyed chunky princess is a pretty good sleeper. She is strictly nursed (no formula) so, we do wake at least one time at night for a snack and then right back to sleep she goes. But ya'll I'm starting to notice a cycle. Maybe 'cycle' isn't the best word to use since it can be referenced to several other things in life so, I'll go with pattern. Yeah, a pattern. She sleeps really good, woo hoo, momma gets some rest and then once my body gets used to that great amount of sleep BAM! No more sleep for you momma because brown eyed chunky princess needs very little sleep and I do mean VERY little. You know what happens when momma doesn't rest? Well, I don't know about your body but mine does not like it! Mommy zombie takes my place and words start to slur. The other night I was sitting in the chair resting my weary head on my hand and I kid you not, my pinky finger startled me.
Alas this shall pass (ha) and she will be back to my good little sleeper. I'm hoping that at some point this pattern will cease and momma zombie will be gone forever. It all started when 'food' was introduced into her diet.
PS. I can't let her cry it out! I did some with my son. But now I just picture myself in a crib with very little function over my body while screaming my head off and NO one is coming. "Will I be by myself forever? No one loves me Waaawwwww" Yeah, not happening in this house. If I do have to let her cry I'm in there every 5 minutes. May explain why I'm so exhausted but I don't care. If she is up at night that is just time for me and her, no noise, no brother over the shoulder. Just me and my baby. My last baby.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

The Bigger Picture

Sometimes (most of the time) I have trouble seeing the 'bigger picture' that is God's Plan. I pray and pray to see His plan, but truly I'm clueless.
This last year I applied for a transfer from the school I had been currently teaching. I have excellent references including that of my current principal and had even been asked to speak at a state conference! I truly LOVE teaching and was excited about this next step in my career. I went to interview after interview and would get feedback that the principals wanted me BUT nothing. No transfer. I was clueless until June 4th on my son's birthday when I found out I was pregnant! OOOhhhhh. I get it now, thank you Jesus for watching out for me. Because that pregnancy was high risk and I was taken off of work on October 17 at just 24 weeks pregnant. All of this we knew very early on and God was truly watching out for me, my family, and my school that I where I was teaching.
Time after time He reveals His plan and proves what I should already know and that is that His Plan is the only Plan and that is for the best.
I see it in other peoples lives! Just 2 weeks ago as Stellan was ultimately fighting for his life and he was to be airlifted to another hospital as his condition worsened for an emergency ablation. Insurance held things up and things 'looked' to be getting worse and then........a new combination of meds were found to work on Stellan's body that kept him out of SVT! Praise Jesus! Because an ablation is very risky on such a little 9 month old body.
So God, once again, please reveal to me the 'Bigger Picture' the ultimate plan, because as we work to sell our house, this happens...
But not before this happened....
That's right! As my husband and I were sitting in the Living Room we hear DOMMBBBB BOOOM. I looked at J and said 'Go outside, that wasn't thunder!' after a couple of minutes I when my husband hasn't returned to give me the okay, I put Little M down and go check things out as well. And here is what we found. Let me tell you that the pictures don't justify the damage this limb caused on my car, his old but not dented pick-up, and our garage door. AND this is only a piece of the limb! We haven't even looked on the roof of our house yet.

In the midst of other issues THIS happens. Seriously?? I'm ashamed (but yet only human) to admit that my initial reaction was that of an immature, backwoods, red-necked, can only find the most illiterate person to put on the news, uneducated idiot. I was in a rant "seriously, you have got to be kidding me, what the crap is this all about"! I confessed to my husband later that I was ashamed of my reaction and was once again reminded that I am not in control and there is nothing I could have done about this situation. Our neighbors are working out the insurance details being that it's not our tree.

But, I am thankful that it didn't go through our roof and harm anyone of my family. And I feel bad that my poor neighbor came home to THIS after 2 days of being out of town at a class. She is probably feeling the same way that I am. No one was hurt and the vehicles are still drivable. The rest will fall into place.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

7 Months Old Already

Where has time gone? She is 7 months old already! What have you been up to this past month Little M?
  • Your rolling over both ways but will do anything to stay off your BELLY!
  • You have been sitting up for about 3 weeks.
  • When you get really excited you squeal and laugh and sometimes topple over.
  • Today you have started lunging for stuff, not just reaching but LUNGING! You 'crawl' on your arms to get what you want which in turn rotates your body so that you belly and legs are on the floor and (insert diving sound effect) land on your nose. Poor baby.
  • Being that you dislike your belly so much, crawling will most likely happen from the sitting position.

  • You are sleeping in your own room and in your own crib and loving it.
  • We figured out after many sleepless nights that when you wake up and see darkness then you cry (loudly) thankfully daddy remembered the projector we got at a shower. With stars, cows, and sheep on your ceiling your a happy camper.
  • You wake up just once and then go right back to sleep after you eat.
  • You have been eating 'real' baby food for 1 month now and are now on 2nd foods.
  • You have finally gotten used to what that baby food does to your tummy.

Smiles and laughter fill our days as we watch you grow. Your daddy and I are sad at how fast this time is going.

  • Mommy finally got some 'girl' time with her best friend this month. You stayed with your daddy and Emmy and apparently fussed every time your eyes were open until I of course came to the rescue. But I have a feeling that you didn't cry the whole time because you love your Emmy and she does anything she can to get smiles out of her grand babies.

  • You are finally warming up to your daddy. Your face lights up when he's in the room and that just melts my heart. Poor daddy, he's putty in your hand and may not even know it.
  • You are so different from your brother. He HATED grass and today you couldn't wait to get your hands on it!
  • You are weighing 16lbs 13 oz and have not been sick one time! (knock on wood)

Sometimes, when I look into your eyes you give me this smile that could save the world. Tears rush to my eyes out of nowhere and at that moment nothing else matters. Little M, we love you more than anything. You and your brother bring us joy everyday. Thank you for coming into our lives, the Lord has truly blessed us. And everything else will fall into place.