Tuesday, June 23, 2009


Compassionate forbearance given to one who offends you, instead of seeking for them the punishment they actually deserve. ~Mercy~
(Some great moms that I know)

Parenting has made me wiser than I ever imagined to be. I remember the days of thinking I knew everything. This is how you should do this... Don't do it that way... I'm right, your wrong, I do it the right way and you don't. I'm not ashamed to admit that I was a bit jaded. Living like that can make you great friends (as long as you agree on everything) and mortal enemies (when you can't agree to disagree). After having my son my whole perspective changed.
My way is right! But, so is yours. It's okay that you bottle feed and I breast feed. It's great that you have family to watch your children for the weekend. AND it's okay that I'm not comfortable with that yet. You work at a 'paying' job and I work at home. It's all okay. Your kids are going to be just fine and grow up happy and healthy, I have no doubt. Just as my kids are going to be just fine and grow up happy and healthy, I have no doubt.
I've also learned to take all the advice from friends and family as shared love. Some advice I use, some I don't. I will never get mad for someone sharing their experiences or offering to help. Just today I was reading in one of my new Parenting Magazines ( the freebies that come after having a new baby ) a tip on getting your child to take their medicine. It said "put a little chocolate syrup in the dose of medicine and it will be like a treat". NO, I won't do that! I'm not mad at the Magazine for suggesting that, just like I wouldn't be upset with you for suggesting I do that. Because guess what? What works for one doesn't always work for both.
Sometimes it's like I've been dropped into an unwanted universe where a competition is evolving between mommies and how each parents. One of the best mom's I know does things completely different from the way I do things. Her children are happy, healthy, smart, involved, thriving, and beautiful I might add. (haven't seen her in a while though) My best friend and I do things similar, which is great, because she has 3 beautiful children and a lot of wisdom. I call her up and ask her things all the time. My sister-in-law has 3 wonderfully vibrant children and I could go on and on about their qualities, but I would just bore you even more with bragging by a proud aunt. Back to the reason for the post, my SIL and I are alike and different in many ways. But she is smart and is a GREAT mom. Just because we do things differently doesn't make either one of us better than the other. (Love you Sis)
Not to long ago my heart was really hurt by someone's shared thoughts with how we do things in our household. I've always respected this person and offered help the way others have done for me. And I was floored when this came about though after a lot of prayer and time I'm coming to peace about the situation. Today I was reading MckMama's blog on Mercy at www.mycharmingkids.net she really gave some great verses and reminded me of how God doesn't want us to have hurt and unforgiveness in our heart. Just as he doesn't want us to cause hurt to others.
So, for those:
  • I have offended in my once jaded view, I humbly ask your forgiveness.
  • New Moms, be aware that you are going to get a ton of advice, take it as shared love and wisdom. It's not judgmental on the way you parent. It's love and caring advice. Take it or leave it and do so without offense.
  • Moms like me and feel like there is a competition going on. It's not a requirement to be involved. Just do what you do and keep being a great mom.

The Lord has given us these children. We are to protect, nurture, and raise them as GOD would have us to do. He is the only one we have to answer to. And He knows us in our heart of hearts.

A long post I know, if you read it, thank you for joining me in my journey as a Stay at Home Mom and a new Mom to 2 children. Life is changing and we are finding our new normal.

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